Friday, December 27, 2013

The Golden Rule

Thinking back, I remember a time during college when I was waiting tables at a popular chain restaurant. I had a family that were weekend regulars. The mother and children were fine, nice people - easy to please. The father was not. He was the sort that was always unhappy - I simply couldn't please this man and he never left me a tip. It really bummed me out that I couldn't conquer him and make him change his irritated, miserable, bitter attitude. So, I decided I would not cower at his crabby demeanor but return all his negativism with an overly positive reciprocal - or "kill him with kindness." This guy was a tough nut and my tactic did not change him. What it did do, however, was get me a tip. His wife snuck back after the family left the table and gave me a nice tip. The more important thing that took place was that I wasn't left bitter and with a bad attitude myself. My conscious effort to not match this guy evil for evil allowed my heart, my spirit to remain positive. I didn't realize it at the time, but I was following the Golden Rule.

What is the Golden Rule exactly? Let's start with a general public understanding of this ethical code. And what better place to find the popular definition than Wikipedia. Here's what Wiki has to say about The Golden Rule:

The Golden Rule or ethic of reciprocity is a maxim, ethical code or morality that essentially states either of the following:
  • (Positive form of Golden Rule): One should treat others as one would like others to treat oneself.
  • (Negative form of Golden Rule): One should not treat others in ways that one would not like to be treated (also known as the Silver Rule).
This concept describes a "reciprocal", or "two-way", relationship between one's self and others that involves both sides equally, and in a mutual fashion.

This concept can be explained from the perspective of psychology, philosophy, sociology and religion. Psychologically, it involves a person empathizing with others. Philosophically, it involves a person perceiving their neighbor as also "an I" or "self." Sociologically, this principle is applicable between individuals, between groups, and also between individuals and groups. (For example, a person living by this rule treats all people with consideration, not just members of his or her in-group). Religion is an integral part of the history of this concept.

As a concept, the Golden Rule has a history that long predates the term "Golden Rule", or "Golden law", as it was called from the 1670s. As a concept of "the ethic of reciprocity," it has its roots in a wide range of world cultures, and is a standard way that different cultures use to resolve conflicts. It has a long history, and a great number of prominent religious figures and philosophers have restated its reciprocal, "two-way" nature in various ways (not limited to the above forms).

Rushworth Kidder notes that the Golden Rule can be found in the early contributions of Confucianism (551–479 BC). Kidder notes that this concept's framework appears prominently in many religions, including "Hinduism, Buddhism, Taoism, Zoroastrianism, and the rest of the world's major religions". According to Greg M. Epstein, " 'do unto others' ... is a concept that essentially no religion misses entirely." Simon Blackburn also states that the Golden Rule can be "found in some form in almost every ethical tradition". All versions and forms of the proverbial Golden Rule have one aspect in common: they all demand that people treat others in a manner in which they themselves would like to be treated.

With that all said, I find it a titch bothersome that Christianity is not mentioned except for "and the rest of the world's major religions". Ugh. I am quite obviously a Christian and I find my personal peace, understanding on how to live and sense of worth in the Truth of God's Word and the teachings of Jesus Christ. The version of the Golden Rule that I will be digging into over the next four posts (at least) come from the Bible, more specifically, Jesus' Sermon on the Mount (Matthew) or the Sermon on the Plain (from Luke).

The heart of Jesus' teachings in this well known sermon is love. Particularly, in this case, it is love for your enemies. I will begin with The Golden Rule (as quoted in both Matthew and Luke) and continue with the four verses of thanks that follow. I am giving you The Golden Rule, first, from the New International Version of the Bible (the version that I typically study from) - it will be most familiar to you from there. I will then give it to you from the International Standard Version which is a more contemporary (and understandable) version of the King James Version of the Bible. For the sake of following the word thanks most literally, I find my verses originally in the KJV. According to my understanding, the KJV it is the closest "word for word" translation to the original Hebrew and Greek.

The Golden Rule, the subject of this series of posts:

"So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets." Matthew 7:12 (NIV)

"Do to others as you would have them do to you." Luke 6:31 (NIV)

"Whatever you want people to do for you, do the same for them." (Luke 6:31 ISV)


Our verses of thanks, which explain in a Christian view, what the Golden Rule means and how we apply it to our lives:

"If you love those who love you, what thanks do you deserve? Why, even sinners love those who love them. (32) If you do good to those who do good to you, what thanks do you deserve? Even sinners do that. (33) If you lend to those from whom you expect to get something back, what thanks do you deserve? Even sinners lend to sinners to get back what they lend. (34) Rather, love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them, expecting nothing in return. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind even to unthankful and evil people. (35)" (Luke 6:32-35 ISV)

Confession - the last verse (v. 35) actually has the word ungrateful, I changed it to unthankful as to keep it in line with my mission of finding thanks in the Word. The King James Version is the only version in this case that uses a form of the word thanks and it's language is too confusing for this simple mind to follow. Please offer me your grace on this word change for the sake of continuity.

Matthew Henry gives his commentary on these verses; "These are hard lessons to flesh and blood. But if we are thoroughly grounded in the faith of Christ's love, this will make his commands easy to us. Every one that comes to him for washing in his blood, and knows the greatness of the mercy and the love there is in him, can say, in truth and sincerity, Lord, what wilt thou have me to do? Let us then aim to be merciful, even according to the mercy of our heavenly Father to us."

Here's an applicable quote from the Scottish Free church preacher, J. O. Dykes, in his sermon "Returning Good for Evil, the Wisest Course"; "God has made human souls more susceptible, on the whole, to kindness than to any other moral force; and such kindness as this, which can net only forgive, but suffer, offence, is fit to melt the rock and to tame the brute. It is not by His words only, but much more by His acts, that Jesus has fulfilled this law which substitutes generosity for revenge. In His person we see the supreme example of His own rule."

I may not have been able to win over my discontent customer with the practice of the Golden Rule, but I like to think that there may have at least been a teachable moment for the mother with her children. Or maybe somewhere down the road the man came back to the kindness that was shown him and softened some. Jesus' teachings on the basic way to treat others was always based on love. While the Golden Rule is sometimes expressed in negative form outside the Bible (see point 2 above in the Wiki definition), Jesus not only forbids treating others spitefully but also commands that we love everyone - even our enemies.

If we are in God's will and have received Christ as our Lord and Savior our souls are ready for heaven. There is a good chance that "our enemies" are not ready for heaven (based on their words and actions that are outside of this love). God wants us to be strong and courageous in His love for others. He promises to protect, abide by and reward us for our obedience to His commands and His call on our lives. Will you dare to change the tide and not repay evil for evil but with love instead? It's a command from Jesus for our greatest good and His glory!

I am so thankful that my ultimate teacher is Jesus and when I am obedient to His teachings the reward is always something worth striving for.

"And be thankful." Colossians 3:15b

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